The midpoint of the week can leave us all feeling restless. So I thought I’d propose a little game of What’s Your?
What’s your (fill-in-the-blank)? is my favorite question to ask people when I’m first getting to know them. Since this wonderful world of blogging is all about sharing, I’m asking you: “What’s your superhuman power?” We all have at least one.
I’m not talking about the leaping-tall-buildings-in-a-single-bound or bench-pressing-bridges kinds of powers (although if you can do that, please don’t hold back). I’m talking about those daily life activities that befuddle most folks but that you can do in your sleep.
I used to say I had three: parallel parking, fitted-sheet folding and editing. Not bad as superhuman powers go, but after years of bragging, I’ve discovered my Kryptonite.
Superhuman Power #1: Parallel Parking
From age 15-35 this was my #1 skill. I could maneuver into the tightest of spaces in one effortless attempt. I even drew applause a time or two.
But it turns out that if my parking prowess was one part skill, it was five parts small car. After a solid 20-year run, I bought a RAV4 and learned that I too would need to pass by the primo street spot, cruise on down to the garage, and walk.
Superhuman Power #2: Fitted-sheet Folding
Kryptonite: Laziness (or Apathy)
While I’m not going to pretend that I match the machine-manipulated crispness of sheets fresh from the store, I can fold the fitted variety with a precision that would make Martha Stewart smile.
Problem is: I hate doing laundry, and I don’t care if my linens look like the Leaning Tower of Pisa. I’ve got better things to do, like writing about made-up superhuman powers.
Superhuman Power #3: Editing
I’m pretty sure my coworkers cringe when they send their writing to me for a once over. I don’t know what it is, but errors just jump off the page. Inconsistent tense? Caught it. Extra space? Removed. Misused their, there and they’re? Take that, homophones!
But when I turn that eagle eye inward, all power is lost. From blurting out inappropriate statements to typing its for it’s, I can’t edit myself worth a damn.
I almost wrote “dam” to illustrate the point, but I know that once I press “Publish,” I’ll find a half a dozen unintentional mistakes. Grrr!
New Superhuman Power: Monkey Toes
As I wrote this post, I realized I effectively had debunked my earlier claim that “we all have at least one” superhuman power. Stupid Kryptonite!
Then I remembered Toemail, a hilariously creepy and entertaining blog dedicated to “making the world a better place, one foot at a time.”
Eureka! That’s it. My monkey toes. Scoff if you like, but when I spread these bad boys out, beware.
These 10 little piggies might never go to the market, but they can pinch, prod or pick up just about anything on command. They’ve saved me countless hours of cleanup time, and probably several trips to the chiropractor, as there’s never a need to bend down to snag that shirt off the floor.
So there you have it. My superhuman power. What’s yours? Comment if you like, or if you’ve written about yours previously, share the link too. Happy Humpday!